By my calculations, the next castaway will be named Yelnick McWawah

Lost fans bug the crap out of me. They annoy me SO much, I can't stand talking to them sometimes. Let me clarify: I think Lost is a fine show. It was better in season 1 and the story kind of drags, but all in all, I keep watching and I enjoy myself when I do. I guess you could say I'm a fan of the show. The people who annoy me are the conspiracy theorist uber-fans, who look for deep philosophical meaning in each episode. And now, since they're all Tivo owners, they spend hours deconstructing and analyzing the blurry image of a medicine bottle that appeared on screen for less than 5 seconds! They're the same people who figured out that when Walt appears he speaks backwards and then they actually output reversed audio to find out what he said! And don't even get me started on all the crap that adds up to 108 or multiples thereof! I can't get that invested in a show. I just can't. The most I can do is watch the show every week, buy the DVDs, and watch them over and over again. I will not resort to scouring each episode for hidden meaning that may or may not be there in the first place.

You can thank a co-worker of mine for inspiring this little rant. He's a wannabe Lost uber-fan but he does have tons of friends who are uber-fans. So, this past Thursday I come into the office and he immediately tracks me down to ask --SPOILER ALERT-- "What did you think about that black light diagram on the blast door? Wasn't that cool?" I proceeded to tell him that I could care less. He then said "Wanna know what it means? A friend sent me the whole translation." My only thought at that point was, "Don't these people have anything better to do than to translate a diagram from an ABC TV show?" COME ON! My stance is this: if the writers/creators of the show wanted me to know what the diagram meant, they'd tell me. If not, then I'm good not knowing. I trust that they won't lessen my enjoyment of the show just because I don't spend hours on the internet looking for Lost references in the Second Book of Poetics by Aristotle.

So please, don't ask me what I think the hieroglyphics mean, or where the food came from, or what Walt said, or if I knew that so and so was Shannon's father and whether or not I saw him in Kate's dream that was featured in Jack's flashback as told by his father to Sawyer's dog while they were on Eko's plane! I DON'T KNOW!

Now, can we please feature Eko more in the show? He's the best character of the lot!